Four-Letter Word For Censorship?

Anyone catch The Oscars this past Sunday? I did. All three and a half hours of it. If you were doing something real with your life, bravo. Keep doing your thang. The ceremony itself is of no consequence. The juicy stuff comes after the show in the form of dribble that every dodo feels they need to broadcast on twitter, facebook, blogs, news sites, sky writing, town crier, graffiti, what have you. This time, a writer from The Onion tweeted that most adorable child actor ever, Quvenzhané Wallis, is a cunt. I'm a big fan of The Onion, but really? This little girl is going to be the next Annie. You just called little orphan Annie a cunt. The sun will NOT come out tomorrow, unidentified Onion writer. 

Oh sure, she totally had it coming. And she'll DEFINITELY get the biting wit of that tweet. I'm sure she'll look at it and think, "what an insightful and succinct examination into the media and the Hollywood Foreign Press."NINE. SHE'S NINE. Not to mention child actors have a 50/50 shot of being fucked up. Best case scenario, the writer was poorly satirizing America's obsession with celebs. Worst case, he's just calling a talented African-American girl a word that most people consider to be the filthiest of cuss words. 

After an hour, the tweet was taken down and the next day an apology was issued. However, now former Onion staffers are fighting back crying censorship. I didn't know that this was the first retraction The Onion had ever issued but I think it was a wise decision made by the CEO, Steve Hannah. Maybe it is taking away "editorial freedom," but there's a difference between satirizing someone, like a politician, in a funny insightful way and satirizing a nine year old, who hopefully doesn't even know what the word cunt means. The Onion's usual targets are politicians, governments, celebrities and religion--people and organizations whose actions should be examined and made fun of. 

After all this cunt business, no one is even talking about what a great job Quvenzhané did in Beasts of the Southern Wild. And no one is even talking about the original issue that the tweeter was trying to get at, which only goes to prove that shock for shock's sake is not always the best plan. 

What If?

There are some days when I want to feel like I'm not letting my brain atrophy, but I don't want to crack open any textbooks. So what do I do to quench (or rather, dampen) my thirst for knowledge? I head to the Netflix documentary section. Today I saw something that piqued my interest because of its relevance in my life today. As a recently unemployed, somewhat directionless 20-something, I spend a lot of time on Craigslist. I'm not talking trade a coffee table for a blowey, just job stuff. When I saw the premise for Craigslist Joe, I thought, "really? This dude is gonna try to survive for 30 days based on nothing but Craigslist ads? Pssshyeahright." Joe Garner's central thesis poses this question: is technology hindering or enhancing our sense of community? But I think he actually boils down to the the age old question: is man good or evil? 

Joe ends up taking a lasso-shaped journey around America stopping mostly in major cities with the occasional pit stop in a small town and I think that based on his experience, we can assume that man is good. And I hate to be the one jaded jerk who shits all over the sunny happy unicorn rainbows party, but I have to wonder if the circumstances would have been any different if Joe wasn't a regular looking white dude who had a camera man following him around. I also have to wonder how much more altruistic these strangers became once they saw a camera pointed in their faces. Joe looks like a Joe. Remember in 2008 when McCain based half of his presidential campaign on wanting to help Main St. America and the regular guys? The Joe Plummers of America! McCain met Joe Garner and decided to base his campaign on him. He was well groomed, wore jeans, a plain jacket and a backpack the entire time. But would Joe have spent more than one night sleeping in a booth in a coffee shop if he looked a little more homeless and had a hidden camera? Would these strangers have been extra nice and given him food and clothes?

The other issue is safety. I don't think he ever had to worry too much about safety since he has a walking insurance policy following him in the form of Kevin the cameraman, but as a woman who has traveled in a foreign country by herself and gotten pick-pocketed, I can't help but think boy, it would have been nice to have a camera man following me to record the fucker who stole my passport and money. I know plenty of women who have traveled alone successfully, but when it actually happens to you your opinions lean the other way, like McCain and torture (gosh, lots of McCain parallels here). And I didn't even get assaulted! But even pick-pocketing left me with that nagging paranoia I can never  fully shake. That and the fact that my parents are avid local news and 20/20 watchers. Goddamn it, John Stossel. Crushing my optimism, one episode at a time. 

This is not to discredit his efforts at all. He was proactive in finding free events in which to meet people and he volunteered in the cities that he stayed in for more than a couple of days, trading labor for a free meal or a place to stay. I also think he had to be smart in what postings he responded to. 

When Joe's mother asked him to sum up his trip, he said that it was inspiring. And whether or not he meant to inspire as well as be inspired, it has made me reexamine my trust issues and I can only hope that I meet as many generous, kind-hearted strangers as Joe met so I can say "HA!" to that John Stossel voice in the back of my head. My other take-away came when the credits rolled and Zach Galifianakis was listed as the Executive Producer, which made think, "Huh. People are surprising."

Valentine's Day. A day to celebrate with your snookumshoneyboobear. Well today I celebrate with New York City! It's my two week anniversary with the city and I'm pretty content. I've had my usual Laugh/Cry moments, but hey, I moved to a new city I didn't become a new person. Here's a recap of my first two weeks in NYC:

-Bought a massive winter coat for the upcoming blizzard Nemo (why name it Nemo, meteorology dudes? Not only did we have to suffer through a blizzard, but we had to suffer through so many Finding Nemo jokes. And joke is a generous word). This is what I look like:

 I've been seriously spoiled by the mild South Carolina winters.

-Also bought an app to help me navigate the subway system. Thank god I didn't move here pre-iPhone because I would most certainly get mugged walking down the street with my head in a subway map. With my nifty app, I can discreetly pretend like I'm checking something really important. Work emails! Social engagements! Stock prices! I could be checking any one of these things! But in reality, I'm just trying to find my way to a bakery.

-Helped a couple find the F train. Practically a local, right? Then I looked down at my fancy app and realized I was on the wrong road.

-I was offered a job at a real estate leasing firm in Williamsburg run by some Hasidic Jews. A friend of a friend presented the opportunity to me and while I was grateful for the offer, real estate sales is everything I never wanted to do. But hey, I'm one for one in interviews and job offers. Send some good juju my way, internet people. Mama needs a cool new job.

-Made friends with some locals! For instance, when I went to the grocery store, I was one those obnoxious people who had bags but forgot about them until the cashier was half way done bagging. After I piped up, she muttered some expletive under her breath and I said "Thanks!" and went along my merry way. Margie and I aren't BFF yet, but slowly I melt her icy exterior. I've actually met some cool friends of friends since being here, but I definitely need to join some sort of organization and get some friends. How do you make friends? A knitting circle? Is that what the kids are doing these days? But seriously, if you're not in school, don't work with cool people, already have friends who can introduce you to other nice people, how does one meet other people?

Sooo you guys ponder that while I watch When Harry met Sally and 10 Things I Hate About You. What? I'm not allowed to be cliche on Valentine's Day? The whole damn holiday is a cliche. Just because I'm sans man this (and every) V-Day doesn't mean I can't enjoy the best parts of the holiday: chocolate and rom-coms. Love you bye!