My life for the past two weeks can be summed up in one word: chaos.

Here are the stats:
2: job offers
2: jobs accepted
1: tutoring job quit
2: shifts as a foodrunner at a greasy pizza joint
1: shift as a waitress at said greasy pizza joint
23: dollars lost in tips as a result of my shoddy bookkeeping skillz
1: job at greasy pizza joint quit
5: jobs I had at one point in time
5: years off my life trying to decide how I will juggle these jobs
5: hour shifts at my new desk job where I have little to nothing to do but fuck around on the internet (more blarticles!)
1 million: tissues I've used since this damn allergy attack started
4: the number of feet high the trash pile outside my apartment is after cleaning out the attic
3: cockroaches that fell out of the attic
1: small claustrophobia-induced panic attack from the massive amount of shit piled in our living room (which later transformed into 4 ft high Trash Mountain)

...and a partridge in a pear tree.